Babies cry to communicate, and it is not always obvious what they need. Hunger, tiredness, discomfort and wanting closeness can all play a part, by day as well as at night. Start by checking your baby, rather than assuming every cry is hunger, wind or something you have done wrong.
Check for illness or pain first
Call 000 if your baby is struggling to breathe, has blue or grey lips, is unresponsive or very difficult to wake, collapses or has a seizure.
A temperature of 38°C or above in a baby under 3 months needs urgent medical assessment. Take a newborn with fever to a hospital emergency department; for an older baby under 3 months, go to emergency if you cannot get prompt medical care. Do not wait to see whether fever medicine helps. A baby can be seriously unwell without a fever.
Seek urgent care for green vomit, markedly reduced feeding, unusual floppiness or sleepiness, or much fewer wet nappies than usual. A sudden, persistent or very different cry also needs prompt assessment, especially if your baby seems in pain or unwell.
Do not dismiss a sudden change as colic or teething. If your baby has an injury, blood in their poo, repeated vomiting or a swollen tummy, seek medical advice promptly. Trust your concern if this is different from their usual behaviour.
What crying can look like in the early months
Crying often increases in the first weeks, is more intense around 6 to 8 weeks, and eases over the following months. Some babies are particularly unsettled in the late afternoon or evening. These are broad patterns in otherwise well babies, not a reason to ignore pain, feeding problems or illness.
Night waking is common in infancy. A baby who wakes to feed or needs help settling has not failed to learn a rule. The amount of crying and the response to soothing vary; a difficult evening does not mean you are doing a poor job.
Work through ordinary needs
- Feeding: look for feeding cues and offer a feed when needed. Do not rely only on how long it has been since the last one. If feeding is painful, difficult or rarely seems satisfying, ask for a feeding assessment.
- Comfort: check the nappy, clothing and whether your baby seems too warm or cold.
- Rest or a quieter space: reduce bright lights and busy activity if your baby is turning away or becoming tired.
- Closeness: a cuddle, soft voice or gentle swaying may be what they need. Keep their face visible and their breathing clear.
Try one calm response at a time and watch how your baby reacts. You do not have to keep adding stronger movement or louder noise if they are still crying. Ask another calm adult to take a turn when you need a break.
When there is no obvious explanation
People sometimes call prolonged, hard-to-settle crying “colic”. That label does not tell you the cause. Your GP can check feeding, growth, health and the pattern of crying before you settle on an explanation.
Crying for a set number of hours does not diagnose cow’s milk allergy. Reflux, allergy and feeding difficulties need assessment in context. Avoid changing formula repeatedly, cutting foods out of a breastfeeding parent’s diet or starting reflux medicine just to see whether crying stops. A clinician can advise if a specific change is needed.
Gripe water, herbal colic mixtures and spinal manipulation are not harmless solutions to unexplained crying. Ask your GP before using a treatment or supplement, and explain everything your baby is already receiving.
If your baby falls asleep while being comforted
Move them to their own safe cot or bassinet, on their back with their head and face clear. Keep soft objects and loose bedding out. Do not fall asleep holding your baby on a sofa, chair or your chest. Ask for help if you are too tired to keep holding them safely.
Make a plan for overwhelming moments
Never shake, hit or roughly handle a baby. If you feel close to losing control, place your baby on their back in an empty, safe cot and step into another room briefly to calm yourself. Stay nearby, check on them and call a trusted adult to help. A short safety pause is better than holding your baby while you feel unable to stay gentle.
If you are afraid you might hurt your baby, get help immediately; call 000 if anyone is in immediate danger. If a baby has been shaken, call 000 even if they seem all right. Tell the health team what happened so they can help.
Let your GP or child and family health nurse know if crying is wearing you down, you are frightened by your reactions, or you feel persistently anxious or low. You do not need to wait until your baby’s crying reaches a particular number of hours to ask for help. An early parenting service may be able to support your family.
What to take to an appointment
A few notes can help: when the change began, feeds, wet and dirty nappies, vomiting, sleep and what you have tried. Tell the clinician what support you have at home and whether you are getting any rest. The goal is a plan for both your baby’s needs and yours.
Sources and further reading
- Better Health Channel: it is not OK to shake babies
- Raising Children Network: crying babies
- Royal Children’s Hospital: unsettled or crying babies
- Raising Children Network: responsive settling at 0–6 months
- Red Nose: six safe sleep recommendations
- Red Nose: co-sleeping and accidental sleep risks
- Red Nose: safe sleeping visual guide
- Royal Children’s Hospital: fever in children
- Royal Children’s Hospital: recognising an unwell newborn or young infant